Isiah to be Paid $18M to Fetch Coffee for Walsh

Let Me Get This Straight...$18M to Do Nothing? I'm IN!

I know I promised to back off of Zeke once this whole soap opera season came to a close. But, c'mon, this organization makes it nearly impossible to keep quiet. And just when you think it can't possibly get any better - it does. With a HT to Mike and Mike in the Morning, we felt obliged to pass along this update on Zeke's new "role" with the New York Knickerbockers.

As you may have heard earlier, Isiah will report directly to Donnie Walsh. This was the first "detail" we heard about his position. Next, we were informed that Isiah, in this esteemed job, would have "no official title" but would provide "meaningful input" to Walsh.

Since those public comments a few days ago, Zeke's responsibilities have come into even clearer focus. In today's New York Daily News, Knicks beat writer Frank Isola reports that, according to a team source, "Thomas has been barred from having any contact with the team as part of his reassignment agreement with Knicks president Donnie Walsk."

OK, so let us recap.

1. Isiah Thomas is fired as coach but Walsh indicates he will remain with the organization due to his tremendous value and ability to contribute to the success of the team and franchise
2. It's revealed that Isiah will report directly to Donnie Walsh
3. Thomas will have "no official" title
4. Zeke is banned from having any contact with the team

So, here's our question? What exactly is Zeke going to do for the Knicks? Our guess, absolutely nothing. While we welcome that concept, some could argue Thomas is getting a pretty decent deal...and we thought Jerome James had a good thing going. Hang out at the Garden every day. Watch some basketball. Maybe occasionally go scout a few players. Oh yes, and of course provide "meaningful input" to Mr. Walsh. As in, "Mr. Walsh, we're out of Splenda, I'd recommend Sweet and Low or Equal as an alternate choice." Perhaps the best-paid secretary in employment history.

Ahhh, Zeke...

Isiah-Related Quote of the Year, Defiant Dolan Cares Not

You didn't think I'd leave this one alone, did ya? It's one thing to restrain oneself from waxing poetic about one former Mets player's issues with anal fissures, it's another thing entirely to go silent about a man who is single-handedly trying to stick it up the ass of New York Knicks fans.

Frank Isola, one of our favorite local Knicks beat reporters, reports in today's NY Daily News that the irrepressibly moronic James Dolan continues to put his faith behind Zeke as head coach in discussions with potential incoming GMs.

Unfortunately, we have neither the time nor the energy to further discuss this story at any length...which is actually fairly convenient as it's left us ostensibly speechless. Instead, we will only quickly pay heed to one of our favorite Zeke-related quotes from this season, a season that could blow any midday soap's best efforts out of the water.

From Isola's unnamed source:

"There isn't a basketball executive alive who would keep Isiah as head coach, but Jim is telling whoever he interviews, 'I would prefer to keep Isiah but you do what you have to do,'" said the source, who is close to Dolan, the Garden chairman. "If Isiah isn't the coach, Jim still wants him to stay in the organization in some capacity."

We love the first sentence. And with that we leave our readers with an age-old proverb. Mr. Dolan, this would be an accurate word to describe your actions as owner of this once-proud franchise.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

The LCG staff awards you no points and may g-d have mercy on your soul.

Knicks Beatwriter Holds Back...Um, Not a Whole Lot Actually

I miss reading the local tabloid sports sections every morning. Back in the day, before the rigors of a day job got in the way, I used to lazily wake up at home and bask in the glory of a Dunkin' Donuts coffee and a stack of local papers. I read from back to front.

In our house, we had the Daily News, Post, Journal-News and Times...every day. Occasionally, Newsday would make the cut if there was a compelling enough Mets back page. Now, we yearn for the smudge of newsprint now predominantly replaced with the likes of our convenient, yet sometimes unfulfilling, Google reader filled with blogs.

What has caused us these reminiscent pangs of longing on this particular day? It's the realization that we're taking our beat writers for granted. Specifically, we're missing out on the memorable musings of New York Knicks who have the privelege of covering this walking catastrophe during a season the likes of which we've never witnessed before and may never again. And, while the Gestapo-like reign of Dolan and MSG is certainly a wear on Knicks beat reporters, it's good to see it's not completely holding back their voices.

Having been out of the office a few days, I was catching up on the goings-on with those ever-entertaining Knickerbockers courtesy of the New York Post's Marc Berman. Berman's Monday column focused on the recent whining of the ridiculous, fat, lazy waste of space that is Eddy Curry. But what I found most refreshing was some of the unapologetically honest, mildly-satirical and genuinely amusing drop-ins from Berman. My favorites below:

In describing the Knicks' state following Sunday's loss:

"Team Titanic II sank further into the abyss..."

Lamenting the reality that Curry and Randolph remain in Knicks uniforms post-trade deadline:

"Curry and Randolph, unfortunately still Knicks after the trade deadline, combined for 19 points on 6-of-24 shooting in an awful 115-92 loss at Air Canada Centre."

In describing Curry's defensive prowess against big man Andrea Bargnani:

"Bargnani all by himself outscored the Knicks' big-man tandem, hitting for 25 points on five 3-pointers, most of them over an unresponsive Curry."

Discussing Zach's effort against Toronto:

"Randolph was a disaster, going 2 of 13 for seven points."

As Berman astutely points out:

"It's only going to get uglier for the Knicks, who fell to 17-39 with 26 games left after losing their seventh straight in this arena."

Our popcorn's ready.

It Has to Stop Now: Empty the Garden

I had no intention of posting anything tonight. My goal was to get home, sit on the couch and watch the Fiesta Bowl. Then, I made the mistake of checking out the Knicks during a commercial. And how can anyone who has ever been a fan of the New York Knicks not be compelled to say something after another mind-boggling awful performance...at home...against the putrid Sacramento Kings...sans three of their top players.

So, here it goes. Short. Simple. It has to stop. If Dolan isn't going to pull the trigger on Isiah, then something else has to happen. Seriously, this is one of the most storied franchises in sports putting out one of the most inept, uninspired and flat out lost team I've ever witnessed in any sport at any level. Chants of "Fire, Isiah!" aren't doing anything, nor will a calculated in-arena fan walkout or even an organized protest outside MSG (although I certainly applaud the effort).

People need to just stop showing up. Period. Don't come late and boo. Don't leave early as an act of feigned definace. Just stop going. Don't even walk through the gates. I know it's easy to say and there are tons of logical reasons that it can't work...but isn't it worth a try? What if those season ticket holders (for starters) just stopped showing up at the Garden. Don't sell your tickets online or give them to a broker. If you can afford seasons in the first place, chances are you're not too hard up. Put 'em in your pocket and envision your seats -- empty.

Imagine if little by little those folks could start leaving their precious seats unoccupied. What if those casual fans who go to a few games a year decided to keep their money in their pockets. In reality, it is the only thing we fans may be able to truly control. It's the age-old "vote with your wallet." C'mon, you can't even make the argument that whatever they're doing right now even qualifies as entertainment. 8-22. Blowout after blowout. Embarrasment after embarrassment. It's unfathomable that Isiah is still on the sideline. Empty the Garden. It could be our only hope.