America, You Blew It

The Greatest Spectacle in Horse Racing is Nearly Upon Us

Shame on you, America. You were given the chance to vote for something that really matters...something that could finally get us on the right track...something that your grandchildren would reflect on one day with tears of gratitude streaming down their tiny little faces...and you threw it all away. I weep for our nation.

As the Assistant Editor of Equine Sports Journalism here at The Legend, the honor of following the blow-by-blow of this year's race for the Kentucky Derby's Infield Chief Party Officer (or simply, the CPO) hath been bestowed upon me.

Like many elections, this one had a candidate that outclassed the others by Secretariat-ish-like standards. Yet, as is seemingly the case far too many times, the "politicking" of it all has clearly clouded our citizens' judgment. The obvious choice? The right man for this job? The right man for the people? The right man for this event, in this great country, on this great weekend?

They call him "Boda." His compelling campaign video is, in a word, inspiring.

Sure, he made it onto the Board of Directors, but what's a Board of Directors without a true leader? It's a complete piece of crap Board of Directors, that's what it is.

Bios of the Board Members can be found here and Boda's bio follows. YouTube also has a plethora of the candidate video entries. Choose for yourself:

Robert Svoboda
Raised on the rough streets of Richmond, Virginia’s West End neighborhood, Svoboda had a tough time fitting in with the local kids, always questioning the status quo with his lofty yet radical ideals. Former teachers described him as a twiddler, a dreamer, a silly heart, and a jabberbox. Upon graduation from University of Sao Paulo, where he double majored in Brazilian jujitsu and international commerce, Svoboda moved to New York City to pursue a career in acting. While on location for a Lowe’s Days commercial in Brooklyn, Svoboda snapped at director Mizzy Fishburn (of former Pop Rocks Fame) and walked off the set swearing that he would never act in that town again. Robert Svoboda is a lifelong thoroughbred speculator, real estate entrepreneur and former film actor.

Sounds like a freaking patriot to me.

Instead, the infield will be "led"by this washed up clown they call "Stymie." It's a travesty of unfathomable proportions.

As for the race, I suggest you look closely at a couple horses I've had my eyes on for a while now, Tequila Mockingbird and Taint Misbehavin', both coming in hot this year.

If you're not yet feeling ready for the Derby, here's a guide from the always-stellar team at Deadspin.